DJANGO UNCHAINED Caption and sync: jcdr
Who's that stumblin' around in the dark?
State your business, or prepare to get winged!
Calm yourselves gentlemen, I mean you no harm.
I'm simply a fellow weary traveler.
Good cold evening gentlemen,
I'm looking for a pair of slave traders
that go by the name of the Speck Brothers.
Might that be you?
Who wants to know?
Well, I do.
I'm Dr. King Schultz, this is my horse, Fritz.
What kinda doctor?
Dentist.
Now are you the Speck Brothers,
and did you purchase those men at the Greenville slave auction?
So what?
So, I wish to parley with you.
Speak English.
Oh, I'm sorry.
Please forgive me, it is a second language.
Now, amongst your inventory, I've been led to believe,
is a specimen I'm keen to acquire.
Hello you poor devils!
Is there one amongst you, who was formerly a resident of The Carrucan Plantation?
I'm from The Carrucan Plantation.
Who said that?
What's your name?
Django.
Then you're exactly the one I'm looking for.
Do you know who the Brittle Brothers are?
Who are they?
Big John…
Ellis…
and Roger… sometime they call him Lit'le Raj.
They was overseers at Carrucan plantation.
Not anymore.
Tell me…
If you were to see any of these three gentlemen again, would you recognize them?
Hey!
Stop talk with 'em like that.
Like what?
Like that!
My good man, I'm simply trying to ascertain-
Speak English, goddammit!
Everybody calm down,
I'm simply a customer trying to conduct a transaction.
I don't care. No sale.
Now off wit' you!
Oh, don't be ridiculous, o'course they're for sale.
Move it.
My good man, did you simply get carried away with your dramatic gesture,
or are you pointing your weapon at me with lethal intention?
Last chance, fancy pants.
Oh, very well…
I'm sorry to have put a bullet in your beast,
but I didn't want you to do anything rash
before you had a moment to come to your senses.
Goddamn son of a bitch!
You shot Roscoe!
And you killed Ace!
Hey, I only shot your brother once he threatened to shoot me.
And I do believe I have
one, two, three, four, five witnesses who can attest to that fact.
Damn leg's busted!
No doubt. Now, if you can keep your caterwauling down to a minimum,
I'd like to finish my line of inquiry with young Django.
God fucking dammit!
As I was saying,
if you were to see the Brittle Brothers again, you could recognize them?
Yeah.
Sold American! So Mr. Speck,
Mr. Speck, how much for young Django here?
That iron is nasty business.
Could you hold this for a moment?
Thank you. Django, get up on that horse.
Also if I were you, I'd take that winter coat the dear departed Speck left behind.
Nigger, don't you touch my brother's coat!
Goddammit!
One hundred… ten…
twenty… and five…
for young Django here.
And since you won't be needing it anymore, I'd like to purchase your brother's nag.
Also… Mr. Speck, I am afraid I will require a bill of sale.
Do you have one?
You go to hell, dentist!
I thought not.
No worries!
I come prepared.
Thank you.
This will serve nicely as a bill of sale.
Now as to you poor devils…
So as I see it, when it comes to the subject of what to do next,
you gentlemen have two choices.
One: once I'm gone, you could lift that beast off the remaining Speck,
then carry him to the nearest town.
Which would be at least thirty-seven miles back the way you came.
Or Two:
You could unshackle yourselves…
take that rifle, put a bullet in his head, bury the two of them deep,
and then make your way to a more enlightened area of this country.
The choice is yours.
Oh, and on the off chance there are any astronomy aficionados amongst you,
the North Star is that one.
Tata.
Now wait a minute fellas, let's talk about this.
You gotta be reasonable on a situation like this.
I'm not a bad guy, look I'm just doing my job!
Blueberry, didn't I give you my last apple?
Tell you what boys, take me to Lit'le Duck in El Paso, I'll get you your freedom.
No. No, please-
What's everybody staring at?
They never seen a nigger on a horse before.
Good morning inn keeper!
Two beers for two weary travelers.
Ah, it's still a bit early.
We won't be open for another hour.
By then we'll be servin' breakfast.
Whoa whoa whoa!
What the hell you think you doin', boy?
Get that nigger outta here.
Help! Help!
Inn keeper!
Remember, get the sheriff, not the marshall.
Alas…
Now we must act as our own bartender.
Sit down, my boy.
What kinda dentist are you?
Despite that cart, I haven't practiced dentistry in five years.
These days I practice a new profession.
Bounty Hunter.
D'you know what a Bounty Hunter is?
No.
Well…
The way the slave trade deals in human lives for cash,
a bounty hunter deals in corpses.
Prost.
The state places a bounty on a man's head,
I track that man, I find that man, I kill that man,
after I've killed him, I transport that man's corpse back to the authorities,
and sometimes that's easier said then done,
I show that corpse to the authorities proving, yes indeed,
I truly have killed him, at which point the authorities pay me the bounty.
So… like slavery, it's a flesh-for-cash business.
What's a bounty?
It's like a reward.
You kill people and they give you a reward?
Certain people, yeah.
Bad people?
Aah!
Badder they are, bigger the reward!
Which brings me to you.
And I must admit that I'm at a bit of a quandary when it comes to you.
On one hand, I despise slavery.
On the other hand…
I need your help, if you're not in a position to refuse, all the better.
So for the time being, I'm gonna make this slave malarkey work to my benefit.
Still… having said that…
I feel guilty.
So…
I would like the two of us to enter into an agreement.
I'm looking for the Brittle Brothers.
However, at this endeavor, I'm- I'm at a slight disadvantage,
in so far as, I don't know what they look like.
But you do… don't you?
I know what they look like, all right.
Good.
So here's my agreement.
You travel with me until we find them-
– Where we goin'?
I hear at least two of them are overseeing up in Gatlinburg, but I don't know where.
That means we visit every plantation in Gatlinburg till we find them.
And when we find them…
you point them out, and I kill them!
You do that, I agree to give you your freedom,
twenty-five dollars per Brittle brother that's seventyfive dollars,
and as if on cue, here comes the sheriff.
Okay boys, fun's over.
Come on out.
All right folks, calm down.
You bout your business.
The jokers will be gone soon.
Now…
why y'all wanna come into my town and start trouble,
and… scare all these nice people?
You ain't got nothin' better to do,
than to come into Bill Sharp's town and show your ass?
What did you jus' do to our sheriff?
Now you can get the marshall.
Marshall, marshall!
Should we wait inside?
Can't we just leave?
After you.
Move that buckboard long ways 'cross the street from the saloon!
I want six men, six rifles behind it.
I want two men, two rifles up on this roof,
two men two rifles on that roof.
All the barrels aimed at that front door.
Somebody git poor Bill outta the goddamn street.
You in the saloon!
We got a hundred riffles aimed on every way outta that buildin'!
You got once chance git outta this alive!
You and your nigger come out right now with your hands over your head,
and I mean, right now!
Is this the marshall I have the pleasure of addressing?
Yes it is.
This is U.S. Marshall Gill Tatum.
That wunderbar, marshall.
I have relieved myself of all weapons,
and just as you have instructed,
I am ready to step outside,
with my hands raised above my head.
I trust,
as a representative of the criminal justice system of The United States of America,
I shan't be shot down in the street,
by either you or your deputies,
before I've had my day in court.
You mean like you did our sheriff?
Shot 'em down like a dog in the street!
Yes, that's exactly what I mean!
Do I have your word as a lawman,
not to shoot me down like a dog in the street?
Well, as much as we'd all enjoy seein' somethin' like that,
ain't nobody gonna cheat the hangman in my town.
Fair enough marshall, here we come!
They're a little tense out there.
So don't make any quick movements, and let me do the talking.
Come ahead.
You unarmed?
Yes indeed we are.
Marshall Tatum, may I address you and your deputies,
and apparently the entire town of Daughtrey,
as to the incident that just occurred?
Go on.
My name is Dr. King Schultz,
and like yourself, marshall, I am a servant of the court.
The man lying dead in the dirt,
who the good people of Daughtrey saw fit to elect as their sheriff,
who went by the name of Bill Sharp,
is actually a wanted outlaw by the name of Willard Peck,
with a price on his head of two hundred dollars.
Now, that's two hundred dollars, dead or alive.
The hell you say!
I'm aware this is probably disconcerting news.
But I'm willing to wager this man was elected sheriff
sometime in the last two years.
I know this because three years ago,
he was rustling cattle from the B.C. Corrigan Cattle Company of Lubbock, Texas.
Now this is a warrant,
made out by circuit court Judge Henry Allen Laudermilk of Austin Texas.
You're encouraged to wire him.
He'll back up who I am,
and who your dear departed sheriff was.
In other words marshall,
you owe me two hundred dollars.
I'll be damned.
After this Brittle business is behind us…
you'll be a free man.
With a horse, seventy five dollars in your back pocket.
What's your plan after that?
Find my wife…
and buy her freedom.
Django…
I had no idea you were a married man.
Do most slaves believe in marriage?
Me and my wife do.
All men in Carrucan did, and that's why we uh…
we run off.
Django…
Django, Django…
You got sand, Django.
Boy's got sand.
I got no use for niggers with sand.
I want you to burn the runaway “r” right here on his cheek.
And the girl too.
And I want you to take 'em to the Greenville auction,
and sell 'em…
Both of 'em…
Separately.
And this one…
you will sell him cheap.
In Greenville?
There should be some sort of a records office.
You know when she was sold…
you know where she came from…
and you know her name.
What is her name?
Broomhilda.
What?
Broom-hilda.
– Broomhilda? – Hm-hm.
Were her owners German?
Yeah, how you know?
She wan't born on The Carrucan Plantation, she was raised by a German mistress.
Von Shafts.
She speak a little German too.
– Your wife? – Hm-hm.
When she was little, her mistress taught her so she has somebody speak German with.
Alright, let me get this straight.
Your slave wife speaks German, and her name is Broomhilda Von Shaft?
Yep.
They call me Hildi.
When we gain access to these plantations,
we'll be putting on an “Act”.
You'll be playing a character.
Hm?
No?
But during the act, you can never break character.
D'you understand?
Yeah. Don't break character.
And you character is that of the “Valet”.
What that is?
That's a fancy word for servant.
– “Valet”. – Hm-hm!
And now Django, you may chose your character's costume.
You's gonna let me pick out my own clothes?
You but of course!
It's against the law for niggers to ride horses in this territory.
This is my valet, my valet does not walk.
I said niggers on horses-
His name is Django, he's a free man, he can ride what he pleases.
Not on my property.
Not around my niggers he can't.
My good sir…
perhaps we got off on the wrong boot.
Allow me to unring this bell.
My name is Dr. King Schultz, this is my valet Django,
and these are our horses Tony and Fritz.
Mr. Bennett,
I've been lead to believe that you are a gentleman, and a business man.
And it is for these attributes we've ridden from Texas
to Tennessee to parley with you now.
I wish to purchase one of your nigger gals.
You and your Jimmie rode from Texas to Tennessee, to buy one of my nigger gals?
No appointment, no nuttin'?
Oh, I'm afraid so.
Well what if I had to say I don't like you, or your fancy pants nigger,
and I wouldn't sell you a tinker's damn.
Now what'cha gotta say about that?
Mr. Bennett,
if you are the business man I've been led to believe you to be,
I have five thousand things that I might say that could change your mind.
Well com'on inside, and get yourself somethin' cool to drink.
Huh? Hm-hm.
Oh maybe, while we discuss business,
you could provide one of your loveliest black creatures
to escort Django here around your magnificent grounds.
Oh, absolutely! Eh, Betina!
Yessir, Big Daddy?
Eh… What's your Jimmie's name again?
– Django. – Django.
Betina sugar, could you take Django there,
and take him around the grounds here to show him all the pretty stuff.
As you please, Big Daddy.
Oh, Mr. Bennett,
I must remind you Django is a free man. He cannot be treated like a slave.
Within the bounds of good taste, he must be treated as an extension of myself.
Understood, Schultz. Betina, sugar?
Yes, sir?
Django isn't a slave.
Django is a free man. You understand?
You can't treat him like any of these other niggers around here,
cause he ain't like any of these other niggers around here. Ya got it?
You wan' I should treat him like white folks?
No.
That's not what I said.
Then I don't know what'cha want, Big Daddy.
Yes… I can see that.
Uh…
What's the name of that peckawood boy from town that works with the glass?
His mama work over at the lumber yard.
Oh, you mean Jerry.
That's the boy's name, Jerry!
You know Jerry, don't you sugar?
Yes 'em, Big Daddy.
Well that's it then…
You just treat 'em like you would Jerry.
The house we just left from, is the big house.
Big daddy call it that, cause it's big.
That there is the pantry.
That's where Bid Daddy hang out his dead meat.
Poor lil' squirrels.
What'cha do for your massa'?
Didn't you hear him tell ya I ain't no slave?
So you really free?
Yes. I is free.
You mean you wanna dress like that?
Betina, I need to ask you something.
What'cho want?
I'm lookin' for three white men.
Three brothers, overseers. Their name is Brittle. Do you know 'em?
Brittle?
Yes, Brittle. John Brittle, Ellis Brittle,
Roger Brittle. Sometime called Li'le Raj.
I don't know dem.
They could be usin' a different name.
They would have come to the plantation this past year.
You mean The Shaffers?
Maybe. Three brothers?
Ahhuh.
– Are they here? – Ah-huh.
Could you point one of 'em out to me?
Well one o' 'em's over in that field.
Old man Carrucan ain't going to appreciate this now, she- she-
she work in a house, John, you could mess her skin up,
and you gonna mess it up, she ain't gonna be worth no-
she ain't gonna worth a damn thing.
Now- like the bible say…
Look, I- I told you, I was the one to make her do it.
You're ready?
She the one who run off with me and, if anybody should be gettin' whipped now,
that should be me! That should be me John, I been here long enough, you know me!
You know me a long time, now!
You know master Carrucan ain't gonna appreciate this!
She's- she's a house slave!
♪Looking for freedom
♪Looking for freedom ah-aah
Please, please now.
Ain't this what you wanted? to keep me from fighting for each other, please…
I's on my knees, John.
I like the way you beg, boy.
Is that who you was lookin' for?
Yep.
Where the other two at?
They by the stable, punishin' Little Jody for breakin' eggs.
They whippin' Little Jody?
Point me in that direction.
You go to that tree, and keep goin' that a'way.
Go get that white man I came here with.
Com'on now. Com'on, girlie!
Let me all… get you set up!
And the Lord said the fear of ye…
and the dread of ye…
shall be on every beast of the earth.
Hey, gimme that arm! You better gimme that arm,
you better gimme that arm!
Okay, she ready!
And after this, we'll see if you break eggs again.
John Brittle!
Remember me?
I like the way you die, boy!
Goddamn son-of-a-bitch!
Ya'll wanna see somethin'?
Aagh! no!
Who are they?
That's Big John, and that's little Raj.
Where's Ellis?
He's the one hightailin' it across that field right now.
– You sure that's him? – Yeah.
– Positive? – I dunno.
– You don't know if you're positive? – I don't know what positive means.
It means you're sure.
– Yes. – Yes, what?
Yes I'm sure that's Ellis Brittle.
I'm positive he dead.
Django!
Everybody calm down,
we mean no one else any harm.
Who are you two jokers?
I am Dr. King Schultz, a legal representative
of the criminal justice system of the United States of America,
the man to my left is Django Freeman, he's my deputy.
In my pocket is a warrant
signed by circuit court judge Henry Allen Laudermilk of Austin Texas,
for the arrest and capture, dead or alive, of
John Brittle, Roger Brittle, and Ellis Brittle.
They've gone by the name Shaffer.
You know them by the name of Shaffer, but the butcher's real name was Brittle.
These are wanted men. The law wants them for murder.
Now I reiterate, the warrant states dead or alive,
so when Mr. Freeman and myself executed these men on sight,
we were operating within our legal boundaries.
I realize…
passions are high,
but I must warn you,
the penalty for taking deadly force against a office of the court
in the performance of his duty is,
you will be hung by the neck until you're dead.
May I please remove the warrant from my pocket so you may examine it?
Gimmie.
Satisfied?
May I have that back, please?
Get off my land.
Post haste.
Load up the bodies as quickly as you can,
and let's get out of here.
Yeah…
That's them sonsabitches.
Now unless they start shootin' first, nobody shoot 'em.
That's way too simple for these jokers.
We're gonna whup that nigger lover to death.
And I'm gonna personally strip and clip that garboon myself.
Damn…
I can't see fuckin' shit outta this thing.
We ready, or what?
Ah hold on, I'm fuckin' with my eye holes.
Oh shit.
I just made it worse.
Who made this goddamn shit?
Willard's wife.
Wеll mаkе yоu оwn gоddаmn mаѕkѕ!
Look, nobody's sayin' they don't appreciate what Jenny did.
Well if all I hadda do was cut a hole in a bag,
I coulda cut it better than this.
How 'bout you Robert, can you see?
Not too good.
I mean, if I don't move my head, I can see ya pretty good, more or less.
But when I start ridin', the bag's moving all over, and I'm ridin' blind.
Oh shit!
I just made mine worse.
Anybody bring any extra bags?
No, nobody brought an extra bag!
I'm just asking.
Do we hafta wear 'em when we ride?
Oh well Shitfire!
If you don't wear 'em as you ride up, that just defeats the purpose.
Well I can't see in this fucking thing!
I can't breathe in this fucking thing, and I can't ride in this fucking thing!
Well fuck all y'all, I'm going home!
Ya know I watched my wife work all day
gettin' thirty bags to get ready for you ungrateful sonsabitches,
and all I hear is criticize, criticize, criticize.
From now on, don't ask me or mine for nothin'!
Now look…
Let's not forget why we're here.
We gotta killer nigger over that hill there.
And we gotta make a lesson outta 'em.
Okay, I'm confused.
Are the bags on or off?
I think… we all think… the bags was a nice idea.
– Yeah. – Yeah.
But not pointing 'ny fingers, they could have been done better.
So how about… no bags this time,
but next time, we do the bags right, and then we go full regalia.
I get my bag off.
Wait a minute!
I didn't say no bags.
But nobody can see.
So?
So, it be nice to see.
Goddamit! This is a raid!
I can't see, you can't see. So what?
All that matters is can the fuckin' horse see!
That's a raid!
Where's this shit!
There he is!
Get that nigger out from under 'at wagon.
And get that nigger lover out o'the wagon!
That nigger ain't down here!
– They're gone! – What?
– They tricked us! – Well where are they?
Auf wiedersehen.
Bull's eye.
Look at 'em run!
Cowards tend to do that.
Goddammit!
Would you care to?
I can't see shit out of this…
He's getting away.
I got 'em.
Big Daddy's getting away.
I got 'em.
Got 'em.
The kid's a natural!
How you know Broomhilda's first masters were German?
Broomhilda is a German name.
If they named her, it stands to reason they'd be German.
Lots of gals where you from named Broomhilda?
Broomhilda is the name of a character
in the most popular of all the German legends.
There's a story 'bout Broomhilda?
Oh yes, there is.
Do you know it?
Every German knows that story.
Would you like me to tell you?
Well…
Broomhilda was a… princess.
She was the daughter of Wotan, the god of all gods.
Anyway, her father is really mad at her.
What she do?
I can't exactly remember. I think she disobeys him in some way.
So he puts her on top of the mountain.
Broomhilda's on a mountain?
It's a German legend, there's always going to be a mountain in there somewhere.
And he puts a fire breathing dragon there to guard the mountain.
And he surrounds her…
in a circle of hellfire.
And there, Broomhilda shall remain,
unless a hero arises brave enough to save her.
Does a fella arise?
Yes Django. As a matter of fact, he does.
A fella named Sigfried.
Does Sigfried save her?
Quite spectacularly so.
He scales the mountain, because he's not afraid of it.
He slays the dragon, because he's not afraid of him.
And he walks through hellfire…
because Broomhilda's worth it.
I know how he feel.
I think I'm just starting to realize that.
Now… Look… Django…
I don't doubt that one day you will save your lady love.
But I can't let you go to Greenville in a good conscious.
A slave auction town in Mississippi isn't a place for you to visit.
Free or not, it's just too dangerous.
But let me ask you a question.
How do you like the bounty hunting business?
Kill white folks, and they pay you for it?
What's not to like?
And I have to admit, we make a good team.
I thought you was mad at me for killin' Big John and Li'le Raj?
Yeah, on that occasion, you were a tad overzealous,
but normally, that's a good thing.
How'd you like to partner up for the winter?
What'cha mean partner up?
You work with me through the winter till the snow melts.
I give you a third of my bounties.
So we make some money this winter, and when the snow melts,
I'll take you to Greenville myself, and we'll find where they sent your wife.
Why you care what happen to me?
Why you care if I find my wife?
Frankly…
I've never given anybody their freedom before.
And now that I have, I feel vaguely responsible for you.
Plus when a German meets a real life Sigfried, that's kind of a big deal.
As a German, I'm obliged to help you
on your quest to rescue your beloved Broomhilda.
Ooh, what happened to mister “I wanna shoot white folks for money”?
His son's with him.
Well good. He'll have a loved one with him.
Maybe even share a last word.
That's better than most of them get,
and a damn sight better then he deserves.
Put down the rifle.
Don't worry, I'm not mad at you.
Just take out Smitty Bacall's handbill.
Read it aloud.
Consider that today's lesson.
Wanted, dead or alive.
Smitty Bacall and the Smitty Bacall…
gang.
For murder and stagecoach ro…
robbery.
Seven zero zero ze-
Seven thousand.
– Seven- – Thousand.
Seven thousand dollars for Smitty Bacall,
one thousand and five hundred dollars for each of his gang
memb… – members.
Known members of the Smitty Bacall Gang are as fellows,
– follows. – follows.
Dandy Michaels, Gerald Nash and…
Crazy Craig Koons.
That is who Smitty Bacall is.
If Smitty Bacall wanted to start a farm at twenty-two,
they would never have printed that.
But Smitty Bacall wanted to rob stagecoaches,
and he didn't mind killing people to do it.
D'you want to save your wife by doing what I do?
This is what I do.
I kill people, and sell their corpses for cash.
This corpse is worth seven thousand dollars.
Now quit your pussyfootin' and shoot him.
Pa?
Pa!
Here…
You need to keep this Smitty Bacall handbill.
Why?
It's good luck.
You always keep the handbill of your first bounty.
That's accurate.
Doctor, Django, how the hell are ya?
Who the hell have you got there?
The Wilson-Lowe Gang.
Who the hell is the Wilson-Lowe Gang?
Bad Chuck Wilson and meaner Bobby Lowe, and three of their acolytes.
Huh.
Well just leave 'em out here, they ain't goin' nowhere.
Why don't ya come on in outta the snowy snow and git yourself some coffee?
Had a birthday yesterday, got some cake!
Pretty good.
Move along!
Do it, walk!
Keep moving.
Don't let that mud slow you down, keep going.
Keep on.
Broomhilda Von Shaft, age twenty-seven,
“r” on right cheek…
Calvin Candie.
He owns the fourth biggest cotton plantation in Mississippi, Candyland.
Candyland?
Oh so you've heard of it?
Ain't no slave that ain't heard of Candyland.
Well, apparently that's where you wife is,
and that's the repellent gentleman who owns her.
Let's just hope she works in the house, not out in the field.
Oh no, she ain't no field nigga.
She… she pretty.
and she talk good, too.
But when they tore her back up, and then they…
burnt that runaway "r" on her cheek…
they goddamned her.
She no field nigger, but she ain't good enough for the house no more either.
They're gonna try to make her comfort girl.
What's a comfort- Oh.
Not while I got freedom…
Not while I got my gun.
So do we offer to buy her?
So…
say…
a man wants to buy a horse…
needs to buy a horse.
He walks up to the farmer's farm, he knocks on the farmer's door,
and asks the farmer to buy his horse. And you know what the farmer says?
The farmer says: “No”.
Well I say: fuck that farmer.
And I'm stealin' that horse.
Fair enough, but now you are horse thief, and they hang horse thieves.
Not to mention the horse goes back to its original owner,
because the horse is still his property.
We need her and we need a bill of sale.
But if we ain't gonna try to buy, then how we gonna get her?
May I offer an alternative plan of action?
Go ahead.
The man walks up to the farmer's farm, he knocks on the farmer's door,
and asks not to buy the horse, but the farm,
and makes an offer so ridiculous, the farmer's forced to say 'yes'.
We're gonna offer to buy Candyland?
No, it's far too big, but apparently, this farmer ain't all about the farm.
How much do you know about mandingo fighting?
What?
Can you convincingly masquerade as someone who's an expert on mandingo fighting?
Why?
Because my character is that of a big money buyer from Dusseldorf,
here in Greenville to buy my way into the mandingo fight game,
and your character is the mandingo expert I hired to help me do it.
They call that “One-Eyed Charly”.
Bonjour.
Bonsoir, p'tite femme noire,
we are here to see Mr. Calvin Candie.
Entrez.
Thank you.
You want me to play a black slaver?
Ain't nothin lower than a black slaver.
A black slaver is lower than the head house nigger.
And buddy, that's pretty fuckin' low.
Then play him that way,
give me your black slaver.
Dr. Schultz!
Good to see you again.
Mr. Moguy.
Thank you for your assistance in creating the opportunity for this appointment.
Nonsense, it's my job.
So, this is the One-Eyed Charly I've heard so much about.
Yes, this is Django Freeman.
Django, this is Mr. Candie's lawyer, Leonide Moguy.
Just call me Leo.
Calvin's in the Julius Caesar room, y'all wanna follow me?
How long have you been associated with Mr. Candie?
Oh, Calvin's father and I were about eleven when we went to boarding school together.
Calvins' father's father put me through law school.
One could almost say, I was raised to be Calvin's lawyer.
One could almost say, you's a nigger.
What did you say?
I said…
Eh nothing, he's just being cheeky.
Now, anything else about Mr. Candie that I should know before I meet him?
Yes, he is a bit of a Francophile.
Ah, what civilized people aren't?
And he prefers Monsieur Candie to Mister Candie.
Hmm, si c'est cela qu'il préfère.
He doesn't speak French. Don't speak French to him, it'll embarrass him.
Get back on top now, turn around.
There you go.
Why do you want to get in the mandingo business?
You don't intend to allow your second to make the proper introductions?
Quit stalling now. Answer the question.
The awful truth?
Pff, I'm bored.
This seems like a good bit of fun.
Well, come on over.
We got us a fight goin' on, that's a good bit of fun.
Won't you accompany me to the bar?
You don't wear a hat in a house, white man, even I know that.
– Dr. Schultz… – What a real pleasure-
Keep fighting, niggers!
.. and I might add, an honor.
Honored to meet you, please have a seat, the pleasure's all mine.
Get Freeman Django here whatever he wants.
And I'll have a sweet tea and bourbon.
Use your weight, boy, use your weight! There you go!
He's much bigger and stronger!
Com'on now!
Ah, he's not doing what I told him. For God's sake.
Bravo, Luigi, cosi e dai. De casse piu rapido.
Com'on now boys, this a fight to the death!
Either him or you ain't!
Ecco i con la spola tappeto. La spola tappeto giù.
Big Fred, com'on!
Turn him around, now!
Use your strength, boy!
Com'on now, use your strength!
There you go!
Look at that!
Yeah I told you, this is a wild man.
Do what I told you, boy.
There you go!
Ah. No! Aah!
Do what I told you. Ground him back, boy.
Ground him back!
Uh, you no lose!
Finish him.
Go on, boy, finish him!
That's why they call him big Fred!
Worth every penny.
Well, arrivederchi, Luigi!
Com'on up now boy, get yourself a rest,
you did a fine job, a real fine job.
Tequila.
What's your name?
Django.
Can you spell it?
D, J, A, N, G, O.
The D is silent.
I know.
Umberto, andiamo.
Mr. Moguy,
I want you to take care o' my new boy here.
You find him a room with a soft bed,
and you bring him up a pony to lick his pole.
You be ready to travel to Candyland tomorrow mornin' now, you hear?
Yessir, Mr. Candie.
Oh before you go, Roscoe, get Fred here a tall beer.
You enjoy that, boy.
You've earned it.
Yessir.
What's your name, boy?
His name is Django Freeman.
Hm-hm.
Where did ya dig him up?
A fortuitous turn of events brought Django and myself together.
I've heard tell about you.
I heard you've been telling ev'rybody that mandingos are no damn good,
ain't nothing nobody is selling is worth buying, I'm curious.
What makes you such a mandingo expert?
I'm curious what makes you so curious?
– What did you say, boy? – Calm down Butch.
No offense given…
None taken.
Uh, Monsieur Candie…
Uhm, I'd appreciate if you could direct your line of inquiry toward me.
One.
You do not have anything to drink, can I get you a tasty refreshment?
Yes! I'll have a beer.
Wunderbar.
Roscoe, a beer for the man with the beard,
and I will have a Polynesian Pearl Diver, do no spare the rum.
Doc…
I'm a seasoned slaver, you are- well, you are a neophyte,
I'm simply trying to ascertain if this cowboy here is taking advantage of you.
With all due respect, Monsieur Candie,
I didn't seek you out for your advice.
I sought you out to purchase a fighting nigger at above top dollar market price.
I was under the impression when you granted me an audience,
it would be to discuss business.
Well, we weren't talking business yet.
We were discussing my curiosity.
Roscoe, Coco, go outside and play.
Sheba,
you stay right there.
I know you didn't mean me.
Prost.
Jambo.
Now according to Moguy,
if I do business with you, I'm doin' business with both o' y'all.
He does the eyeballin', you the billfold, is that it?
Well, you don't make it sound too flattering, but more or less, yeah.
So…
Bright Boy,
Moguy tells me you looked over my African flesh,
and you was none too impressed, huh?
Not for top dollar.
Well then we got nothing more to talk about.
You see, you wanna buy a beat ass nigger from me,
those was all the beat ass niggers I wanna sell, so…
He don't wanna buy the niggers you wanna sell.
He wants the nigger you don't wanna sell.
I don't sell the niggers I don't wanna sell.
Well, hm. You won't sell your best.
You won't even sell your second best.
But your third best you don't want to sell him either…
but if I made you an offer so ridiculous you'd be forced to consider it…
who knows what could happen?
And what do you consider ridiculous?
For a truly talented specimen, well “The Right Nigger”?
How much would you say, Django?
Twelve thousand dollars.
Gentlemen…
You had my curiosity.
Now you have my attention.
Willie… Willie.
Hold up! Hold up.
Aah.
Good morning, gentlemen.
Good Dr. Schultz. Beautiful morning isn't it?
You couldn't have picked a better one.
Please, won't you take a ride with us here in the Victorian.
Oh, thank you very much.
Tie your horse up back there.
Django!
Well I part company from many of my phenologist colleagues,
cause I believe there's a level above bright,
above talented, above loyal that a nigger can aspire to.
Say one nigger that just pops up in ten thousand.
The exceptional nigger.
Bright day uh, Bright Boy?
Sun is up.
Shinin' on all of us.
Have a seat, Doc.
Quite an honor.
The honor is all ours.
Thank you.
.. but I do believe that, given time,
exceptional niggers like Bright Boy here,
will come if not frequent…
more frequent…
Bright Boy,
you are that one in ten thousand.
The name of the game is keep up, not catch up, nigger.
Touch your guns, you die.
Everybody calm down!
I saw the whole thing, no harm done.
Are you- are you kiddin' me, this nigger-
I said no harm done! Now take your hand off your pistol!
Butch!
That means you too.
Ev'rybody stop antagonizing my guests.
Hoot!
Git back upon your horse.
He broke my collarbone!
For God sake, somebody please help Hoot here back upon his goddamn horse.
Aw, now you are one lucky nigger.
You got to listen to your boss, white boy.
Oh I'm a good walkin' in the moonlight for you.
You wanna hold my hand?
Willie! Take us home.
You got a problem with your eyeball, boy?
No sir.
You wan' a boot heel in it?
No sir.
Then keep your goddamn eyeballs off me.
Flash that bad look at me again, I give you a reason not to like me.
Now move, nigger!
You niggers gonna understand somethin' 'bout me.
I'm worse than any o'these white men here.
You get the molasses out yo' ass, and you keep them goddamn eyeballs off me.
He is a rambunctious sort, ain't he?
Indeed!
May you stop for a moment, so I may put put a word in my man's ear?
Yeah, I'm expecting to fall in love once I see the specimens at Candyland,
so before that moment, it would be good if I could have
a confidential strategy meeting with my… confidant.
You mind tellin' me what the hell you doing?
I've confirmed that Broomhilda's at Candyland.
You sure it's her?
He didn't call her by name, but she's a young lady,
whip marks on her back, and speaks German.
Now while it's not wise to assume,
in this instance, I think it's pretty safe.
Point being…
don't get so carried away with your retribution.
You lose sight on why we're here.
You think I lost sight, of that?
Yes, I do! Stop antagonizing Candie!
You're going to blow this whole charade, or more than likely get os both killed,
and I, for one, don't intend to die in Chickasaw County, Mississippi, U.S.A.
I'm not antagonizing. I'm intriguing him.
You you're yelling abuse at these poor slaves!
I recall the man…
who had me killed another man in front o' his son,
and he didn't bat an eye.
Ya r'member that?
Yeah of course I remember!
What you said was…
You said “this is my world…
and in my world, you got to get dirty”.
So that's what I'm doing. I'm getting dirty.
Well you're paraphrasing a tad, but…
that was the generally gist…
see you at Candyland.
Alright niggers!
Back at it.
That means you too, moonlight.
Well I'll 'be! D'Artagnan!
Now boy, why do a fool thing like run off?
I can't fight no more, Monsieur Candie.
Yes you can!
Yоu mіght nоt bе аblе tо wіn, but yоur аѕѕ саn fіght.
Mr. Stonesipher, would you please shut these goddamn dogs up,
I cannot hear myself think!
Hush now, Marsha! Hush up, Marsha! Marsha, hush up!
Hey, get these goddamn dogs away from this nigger!
Well now boy…
Gidown o' that tree. Yes sir.
How long was he lose?
A night…
day…
Half the other night.
How far he git off property?
'Bout twenty miles off prop.
Pretty fer, consid'rin' that limp he got.
Mr. Moguy, who was D'Artagnan supposed to fight on Friday?
One of this new lot.
The way he looks now, a blind Indian wouldn't bet a bead on 'em.
Please Mr. Candie, I ain't got it in me no more, I can't-
No no no no, now no beggin'…
No playin' on my soft heart.
You're in trouble, now son.
I done paid 500 dollars for you…
When I pay 500 dollars…
I expect to get five fights outta a nigga 'fore he rollover and play dead.
Got to understand, I'm… I'm running a business here!
You- you fought three fights.
But I won ev'ry one!
Yes you did. Yes you did,
but that last one, you muddled the line between winning and losing.
Still the fact remain.
I pay 500 dollars, I want five goddamn fights!
So what 'bout my five hundred dollars, huh?
What about my five hundred dollars?
You goin' reimburse me?!
You even know what reimburse means?
I'll reimburse you!
You will?
Yup.
You'll pay 500 dollars…
for pratic'lly a one eyed Ole'Joe ain't fit to push a broom?
No, he won't.
He's just tired of you toyin' with him, is all.
Matter o' fact, so am I.
But we ain't payin' a penny for that pickaninny,
ain't got no use for 'em, ain't that right, Doc?
You heard 'em!
I'm gonna have to excuse Mr. Stonesipher slack jawed gaze, he…
he ain't never seen a nigger like you ever in his life.
Ain't that right, Mr. Stonesipher?
That right.
That matter…
nor I have.
Now…
Seein' as you won't pay a penny for this pickaninny here…
you won't mind me handlin' this nigger anyway I see fit?
He's your nigger.
Mr. Stonesipher?
Let Marsha and her bitches send D'Artagnan to nigger heaven.
Marsha! Git the nigger!
Your boss looks a little green around the gills
for a blood sport like 'nigger fightin'?
No.
He just ain't use to seein' a man ripped apart by dogs, is all.
You are used to it?
I'm just a little more use to Americans than he is.
Now… Monsieur Candie,
whenever you're ready.
We rode five hours so you could show off your stock.
Let's git to it.
Cause as of now, if he's an example…
I ain't impressed.
Follow me.
Line up to the left here now niggers.
That's it.
You gimme a line, gimme a line.
Get in line here. Right now!
Hello, Steven my boy!
Yeah yeah yeah, hello my ass.
Who this nigger up on that nag?
Oh Steven, you have nails for breakfast!?
What's the matter, why so ornery, you miss me, huh?
Ohoh yes sir, I miss you like a hog miss slop,
like a - like a- a baby miss Mammie's titty,
I miss you like I misses a rock in my shoe.
Now I ask you: who this nigger on that nag?
Hey Snowball.
You wanna know my name or the name of my horse, you ask me.
Just who the hell you callin' Snowball, horse boy?
I'll snap your black ass of that nag there in the mud-
Whoa, whoa, whoa, Steven, Steven.
Let's keep it funny.
Django here is a Freeman.
– This nigger here? – That nigger there.
Let me at least introduce the two of you.
Django, this is another cheeky black bugger like yourself, Steven.
Steven, this here's Django.
You two ought to hate each other.
Calvin, just who the hell is this nigger you feels the need to entertain?
Django, and his friend in grey here Dr. Schultz, are customers,
and they are our guests, Steven,
and you, you old decrepit bastard, are to show them every hospitality.
You understand that? Yessir, here I'm understandin',
but I don't know why I gotta take lip off this nigger?
You don't hafta know why. Do you understand?
Yes sir, I understand.
Oh good!
They're spendin' the night, go up in the guest bedrooms and get two ready.
He gonna stay in the Big House?
Steven, he's a slaver. It's different.
In the Big House?
Well you gotta problem with that?
No, no no I got no problem with it,
if you ain't gotta problem with burnin' the bed, the sheets, the pillow cases,
ev'rything up when this black ass motherfucker's gone!
Now that is my problem, they are mine to burn!
Now your problem right now is making a good impression.
And I want you to start solving that problem right now,
and git them goddamn rooms ready!
Yes sir, Monsieur Candie.
Go on now.
Can't believe you brought a nigger to stay in the Big House.
Your daddy rollin over in his goddamn grave right now.
Quite the lip on him!
A nigger in the estate part. What shit is that!?
Now!
Where is my beautiful sister!
There she is!
Dr. Schultz, this attractive southern belle is my widowed sister.
Darling, you are a diamond for tired eyes.
May I present to you Lara Lee Candie-Fitzwilly.
Chester, Rodney, Chicken Charlie, you'll git your ass up on that hill.
Com'on Charlie, go on now.
Go, com'on now. You know where it is.
Like you on a rope!
Niggers don't walk 'round here! Niggers run!
Ah, Monsieur Candie? Hmm?
About that matter, about the nigger gal we were talking about?
Nigger gal?
Yeah, I believe you mentioned she spoke German?
Ah yes, Hildi, what about her?
Do you think before the demonstration you could send her around to my room?
You little Dickens, you!
I don't see why not.
Steven, when you get through showing them to their rooms, go fetch Hildi,
get her cleaned up and smellin' real nice, and sent over to Dr. Schultz's room.
Actually, Monsieur Candie, it's- it's somethin' I ain't told you 'bout yet.
What?
Uh, Hildi in The Hot Box.
What's she doin' there?
What 'cha think she doin' there, in The Hot Box, she bein' punished.
– What did she do? – She run off again.
Jesus Christ Steven, how many people ran away while I was gone?
Two.
And when did she go?
Last night, they- they brung her back this morning.
How bad did Stonesipher's dogs tear her up?
Lucky for her, they was out chasin' D'Artagnan's ass.
Bill and Cody went out lookin' for her, found her and brought her back, uh…
Now she a little beat up,
but- but she done that t' her all damn self, runnin' through them damn bushes and shit.
How long she been in the box?
How long ya think, she been in there all damn day!
And the li'le bitch got ten more days be in there.
Steven, take her out.
Take her out, why?!
Because I said so, that's why.
Dr. Schultz is my guest.
Hildi is my nigger, Southern hospitality dictates I make her available to him.
But Monsieur Candie, she run off!
Jesus Christ Steven, what is the point of havin' a nigger that speaks German,
if you can't wheel 'em out when you have a German guest?
Now I realize it is inconvenient but still, you take her ass out!
Yes sir.
Lara Lee, will you and Cora be responsible for getting
Hildi cleaned up and presentable for Dr. Schultz here?
Of course, darling.
Now gentlemen, I do apologize, but I'm weary for our travels beyond words,
it is time for me to rest my tired eyes.
Ya'all have heard the man, get her ass up outta there!
Cora! Come here!
Get over there, get her cleaned up, bring her back over here to doctor
what- what did you say your name is, Schut?
– Schultz. – Schultz!
Git her back over here, alright girl?
Yes sir.
Hilda, you comin’ with me, or you gonna sleep in that li'le box over yonder?
Hello ladies.
Dr. Schultz, may I introduce to you Broomhilda.
Hildi, this is Dr. Schultz.
It's a pleasure to meet you, Broomhilda.
I've heard a lot of good things about you.
Well, it's not every nigger speaks German, don't you know?
As I look at you now, Broomhilda,
I could see all the passions you inspire completely justified.
The doctor here speaks German!
And I've been informed you do as well?
Go ahead girl, speak a little German.
Astonishing.
– And I should bring- – Much obliged.
Don't be afraid.
Pardon.
Hey Little Trouble Maker.
You silver tongued devil you.
Look Monsieur Candie, they were all fine specimens, no doubt about it.
But the best three, by far, were:
Sampson…
Well, what's his name again? Goldie.
Goldie… and Eskimo Joe.
By the way, why is he called Eskimo Joe?
Oh, you never know how these nigger nicknames get started.
His name was Joe, maybe one day he said he was cold, who knows?
Well, regardless,
Samson's your best,
we all know that,
you will never sell him, and I can see why, he's a champion.
Hmhm-hm! All three are champions.
Samson's a champion.
Them other two pretty good.
Calvin, what that nigger- you let-
That's alright, that's alright.
You have to understand Monsieur Candie,
while admittedly a neophyte in the nigger fight game,
I do have a little bit of a background in the European traveling circus.
Is that right?
Hence… I have big ideas when it comes to presentation.
I need something more than just a big nigger.
He needs to have… panache.
Need to have what what what? Panache, uhm…
– A sense of showmanship! – Showmanship, yes.
I want to be able to bill him him as the “Black Hercules”.
Black Hercules, isn't that clever?
More like “Nigga-les”.
“I would pay top dollar for the Right Nigger”.
Now I'm not saying that Eskimo Joe is the wrong nigger per se…
but is he right as rain?
Dr. Schultz, I will have you know,
there is no one in the nigger fight game that appreciates
the value of showmanship more than Monsieur Calvin J. Candie.
Nobody.
But one must not forget the most important thing in the nigger fight game.
And that is a nigger that can win fights.
Now that should be your first, second, third, four, and fifth concern.
Now after you have that, and you know you have that,
then you can start to implement a grand design.
In other words, first thing is first.
First thing is first.
I see you two gettin' on.
Famously.
Oh Monsieur Candie, you can't imagine what it's like
not to hear you native tongue in four years.
Well hell, I can't imagine two weeks in Boston.
Two weeks in Boston, oh that's your- oh man!
Ah, two weeks in Boston!
I can't express the joy I felt conversing in my mother tongue.
And Hildi is a charming conversation companion.
Ah be careful now Doctor Schultz,
you might have caught yourself a little dose of Nigga'love.
Nigga'love's a powerful emotion, boy.
It's like a pool of black tar, once it catches your ass, you' caught-
Yessir, you caught.
I don't know doctor, you can lay on all the German sweet talk you want, but
it looks like this pony's got big eyes for Django.
Well… naturally, it is the soaring eagle that attracts her attention,
not the plucked chicken.
Dr. Schultz, don't be so down on yourself,
you are quite a dapper European gentleman.
You gotta finish this, you got to put your elbow in this, this is, do you hear me-
You know that nigger, don't ya?
– Who? – Who?
Don't 'who' me bitch, you know who I'm talking about!?
At the table?
I don't know him.
You don't know him?
No.
No what?
No sir.
You wouldn't lie to me now, would you?
Okay…
If- if you says so.
Eskimo Joe's a quality nigger, no doubt about it.
But if it was my money…
I wouldn't pay no twelve thousand dollars for him.
What would your price be?
Well, if I was inclined to be generous,
and I don't know why I would be inclined to be generous…
nine thousand…
maybe.
Dr. Schultz…
Let me reclarify how this whole negotiation came about.
You see, it wasn't me who came to you to sell a nigger.
Sure, it wasn't.
It was you who approached me to buy one.
Sure it was.
Now that nine thousand dollar figure Bright Boy was banding about,
that ain't too far off from right,
and if I wanted to sell Eskimo Joe for that,
I could do so any day of the week.
Any day.
But like you said in Greenville doctor,
I don't wanna sell 'em.
It was only your ridiculous offer
of twelve thousand dollars that made me even consider it.
Hmm-hmm.
You know Monsieur Candie, you do possess the power of persuasion.
Why not, Monsieur Candie, you have a deal, Eskimo Joe, twelve thousand dollars!
Hurray, doctor, hurray, and a wise decision, that is!
However, that is a tremendous amount of money.
And the way you have your Mr. Moguy, I have a lawyer,
a persnickety man named Tuttle,
and I would need my Mr. Tuttle to draw up a legal contract
before I'd feel comfortable exchanging that amount of money for flesh.
Not to mention having Eskimo Joe examined by a physician of my choosing.
Naturally.
So say I return in about…
.. five days time. Five days ?!
With my Mr. Tuttle. And then my Mr. Tuttle
and your Mr. Moguy can hash out the finer details between themselves.
I say splendid Doctor… Splendid.
Gentlemen…
may I propose a toast…
to Eskimo Joe. Or, shall we call him
the Black Hercules!
To the Black Hercules.
The Black Hercules!
The Black Hercules…
You was right, Doctor, that name do have payn-ass.
Hildi…
I'm outta drink, girl.
So Hildi… how you like servin' at the big table in the big house, huh?
When Monsieur Candie talk to you, you answers.
I like it a lot, Monsieur Candie.
Hmm-hmm.
It's a lot better than sizzling in that hot box,
or draggin' your ass through a bramble bush.
Maybe it's not quite as much fun as gettin' to pleasure all 'em mandingos,
- huh sugar bears? - Hmm oh, she like them new.
- Like Sampson, huh? - Yessir.
You know Monsieur Candie,- Hmm?
The doctor here might be interested in seein' Hildi's peeled back,
since how they don't have many niggers where he come from.
Dr. Schultz, when you was alone with Hildi here,
did- didja just speak German, or did ya getta take her clothes off?
No, we just talked and…
Oh so- so you haven't seen her back?
I haven't-
No no no, no, Steven's right, you might find this interesting.
Hildi, com'on take off your dress, show Dr. Schultz your back here, go on!
Uh, Calvin, I just got her all dressed up and looking nice.
But… Lara Lee, Dr. Schultz is from Dusseldorf,they don't got niggers there.
He's a man of medicine.
I'm sure it would fascinate him, the niggers endurance for pain.
These niggers are tough Dr. Schultz, no doubt about it.
Hilda's got somethin' like four lashes on her back.
Lare Lee, just get one n' she'd just- lose her goddamn mind!
Look a' that, doctor, it's like a painting, look at that.
Calvin!
We are eating, ain't no one wanna look at her whipped up back!
Fine. Fine, fine fine fine…
After the dinner, Steven. After dinner.
During the brandies, gentlemen. Uh?
Cora, come get this girl!
- She' a mess. - Yes ma'am?
Oh! Why are you all undone?
I just got you done up, now come over, here!
Baby, you got Steven his bad side, when you need to be on his blind side.
You said you ain't know him?
Huh?
I said… you said you ain't know him.
I don't.
Yes you do.
Mister Steven…
I don't.
Why is you lyin' to me?
I ain't.
Then why is you cry?
You scarin' me.
Why is I'm scarin' you?
Because you scary.
.. to speak German this afternoon with Hildi, was positively soul enriching.
You stay right here.
You indicated earlier you'd be willing to part with Hildi.
Oh yes. Yesiree Bob I did.
In that case… allow me… to propose another proposition.
I'm all ears.
Hurry up, goddammit!
Monsieur Candie- Steven!
You just interrupted Dr. Schultz here!
Uhm… sorry doctor Schultz, my ears ain't worth a damn these days.
Monsieur Candie, could I get a word with you in the kitchen.
You mean get up outta my chair?
If you could manage it.
Why?
It's about dessert.
What about dessert?
I'd rather discuss that in private.
We're havin' white cake.
What sort of melodrama could be brewing back there?
You right Monsieur Candie, you right, I'll handle it myself.
Meet me in the library.
I just can't understand why you won't come talk to the evening,
she get fucked up 'round here, you blame me.
Fine, fine friend Steven, I…
will be along momentarily.
Yessir.
Well…
gentlemen…
as you can see, talented as they are no doubt in the kitchen,
from time to time… adult supervision is required.
If you'll excuse me a moment.
You may clear the dinner service.
So Dr. Schultz…
Why don't you regal us with the tale of the circus?
The circus!
What is the matter?
Them motherfuckers ain't here to buy no mandingos.
They wants that girl.
Steven, what the hell are you talkin' about, hm?
They playin' your ass for a fool, that what I'm talkin' bout.
They ain't here for no muscle bound jimmie,
they here for that girl.
What… what girl. What… Hildi?
Yeah, Hildi. Her and Django?
Them niggers know each other.
He… he just bought Eskimo Joe.
Did he give you any money?
No, not yet, but they go-
Then he didn't buy diddly, not yet no how.
But he's just about to buy who he come here to buy, when I interrupted him.
Thank you Steven. You're welcome Calvin.
Whe where you gettin' all this?
Why would they go through all that trouble for a nigger with a-
with a chewed up back, ain't worth three hundred dollars?
They're doin' it cause that nigger Django's in love with Hildi.
She probably his wife.
Now, why that German give a fuck who that uppity son-of-a-bitch is in love with,
I'm sure I don't know.
If she's who they want…
why this whole… snake oil pitch about mandingos then?
You wouldn't pay no never mind into three hundred dollar.
But that twelve thousand?
That made you real friendly now, didn'it?
Yes it did.
His wife, uh?
If it had been a snake…
we would have beat'em.
Those lyin'… goddamn time…
wastin' sonsabitches.
Sonsabitches!
LARA LEE .. out of New Orleans, so I had quite a bit of practice with… theaters types.
Oh there you are!
I was beginning to think that you and that old crow ran off together.
That'd be a hell of a note, wouldn't it?
Lara Lee…
I was just lookin' out the big window.
Billy Crash is out there dealin' with some
shady slaver try n' sellin' a passel of ponys,
would you be a dear and go out there give them gals an eyeball.
– Of course, brother. – Thank you, darling.
Okay. Business never sleeps.
A propos…
before your exit, we were discussing the possibility of my purchasing Broomhilda.
Ah yes! Yes we would.
And we will again… in a moment.
Who is your little friend?
This is Ben…
He's a Ol'Joe that… lived around here for a long time.
And I do mean a long damn time.
Well Ben here…
took care of my daddy…
and my daddy's daddy…
till the open kill doe who one day…
who been took care o'me.
Growin'up the son of a… of a huge plantation owner in Mississippi
puts a white men in contact with a whole lot o'… black faces.
I spent my whole life here… right here… in Candyland…
surrounded… by black faces.
And seein' them ev'ry day, day in day out, I…
I only had one question.
Why don't they kill us?
Now right up there on that porch…
three times a week for fifty years,
Ol'Ben here… would shave my Daddy with a straight razor.
Now… if I was Ol'Ben, I would have cut my Daddy's goddamn throat,
and it wouldn't have taken me no fifty years to do it neither.
But he never did.
Why not?
You see…
the science of analogy…
is crucial to understandin' the… separation about two species.
In the skull of the African here…
the area associated with submissiveness
is larger than any human or any other sup human species on planet earth.
If you examine…
this peace of skull here…
you'll notice three distinct dimples.
Here… here… and here.
Now…
If I was holding a skull of a- of a… of an Isaac Newton or Galileo,
these three dimples would be found in the area o'the skull most associated with…
creativity.
Βut thіѕ' thе ѕkull оf Οl'Βеn.
And in the skull of Ol'Ben, unburden by genes,
these three dimples exist in the area of the skull most associated with…
servility.
Now Bright Boy…
I will admit you are pretty clever.
But if I took this hammer here…
and I bashed it in your skull…
you would have the same three dimples….
in the same place…
as Ol'Ben.
Now lay your palms flat on the table top!
If you lift those palms off that turtle shell table top,
Mr. Butch is gonna let loose with both barrels of that sawed off!
There have been a latta lies said around this diner table here tonight,
but that you can believe!
Mr. Moguy,
would you be so kind as to collect the pistol hangin' on those boys hips here?
Thank you ever so much.
Doctor.
Where were we?
Jackass.
Oh yes…
I do believe you were just getting ready to make me a proposition to buy Broomhilda.
I am right?
Right then.
Bring out Hildi!
Your way, honey.
Sit your ass in that goddamn chair!
Lay your hands flat on that table.
And shut your mouth!
Dr. Schultz… in Greenville, you yourself said,
that for the “Right Nigger” you'd be willing to pay
what some may consider is a ridiculous amount.
To which, me myself said, “What is your definition of ridiculous?”,
to which you said, “Twelve thousand dollars”.
Now considering you all have ridden a whole lotta miles,
went to a whole lotta trouble,
and done spread a whole lotta bull, to purchase this lovely lady right here,
it would appear that Broomhilda is in fact the “Right Nigger”!
And if y'all wanna leave Candyland with Broomhilda…
the price is twelve thousand dollars.
And I take it you prefer the “take it or leave it” style of negotiating?
Yes I do, doctor.
You see, under the laws of Chickasaw County, Broomhilda here is my property.
And I can chose to do with my property whatever I so desire!
And if you all think my price for this nigger here is too steep,
what I'm gonna desire to do is…
take this fuckin' hammer here, and beat her ass to death with it!
Right in front of both y'all!
Ain't it good, fella?
Then we can examine the three dimples inside Broomhilda's skull!
Now!
What's it gonna be, Doc? Huh?
What's it gonna be?
May I lift the hands off the table top in order to remove my billfold?
Yes you may.
That twelve.
Sold!
To the man with the exceptional beard, and his unexceptional nigger.
Mr. Moguy. Yes Calvin?
You make this gentleman a receipt for twelve thousand dollar, please.
– Twelve thousand dollar. – Hm.
It was a pleasure doin' business with ya all.
Now gentlemen…
If you care to join me in the parlor…
we will be serving white cake.
Well done, Calvin.
Excuse me… Excuse me, madam?
Could you please stop playing Beethoven?
Take your hands off that harp!
Doctor!
- Doc, you can't go in there! - Hey uh, Steven, hey!
– He got no business goin' in there. – Let it be.
He's a little upset, that's all. I'll handle this.
White cake?
I don't go in for sweets, thank you.
You brooding 'bout me getting the best of ya, uh?
Actually, I was thinking of that poor devil you fed to the dogs today.
D'Artagnan.
And I was wondering what Dumas would make of all this.
Come again?
Alexandre Dumas. He wrote “The Three Musketeers”.
Yes of course, doctor.
I figured you must be an admirer,
you named your slave after his novel's lead character.
Now if Alexandre Dumas had been there today,
I wonder what he would have made of it?
You doubt he'd approve?
Yes, his approval would be a dubious proposition at best.
Soft hearted Frenchy?
Alexandre Dumas is black.
Are these Broomhilda's papers?
– Yes they are. – May I?
– Of course! – Thank you.
That is her bill of sale, her ownership history,
and of course her freedom papers, doctor.
Would you have ink and pen for me?
Right over there, on that little table.
Thank you.
Broomhilda Von Shaft…
consider yourself a free woman.
Mister Candie…
Normally, I would say “auf wiedersehen”.
But since what “auf wiedersehen” actually means is “till I see you again”,
and since I never wish to see you again, to you sir,
I say good bye.
Let's go.
Com'on.
One more moment, Doctor!
What?
It's a custom here in the South,
once a business deal is concluded that the two parties…
shake hands.
It implies good faith.
– I'm not from the South. – But you are…
in my house doctor…
so I'm afraid I must insist.
Insist? On what? That I shake your hand?
Oh, then I'm afraid I must insist in the opposite direction.
You know what I think you are?
What you think I am? No I don't.
I think you are a bad loser.
And I think you're an abysmal winner.
Never the less…
here in Chickasaw County, a deal ain't done
until the two parties have shook hands.
Even after all that paper signin', don't mean shit…
you don't shake my hand.
If I don't shake your hand,
you're gonna throw away twelve thousand dollars?
I don't think so.
Mr. Butch,
if she tries to leave here before this nigger lovin' German shakes my hand,
you cut her ass down.
You really want me to shake your hand?
I insist.
If you insist.
Aaah Calvin!
Caalvin!
I'm sorry. I couldn't resist.
The nigger's going crazy, the hell-
Help, he's blowing everybody- Aaah!
Shit! Son of a bitch!
Get that fuckin'…
Get that fuckin'-
Damnit sonofabitch, what- what did the fuckin'- goddammit!
What the-
Don't shoot me!
You stupid sonofabitch!
Sorry Jessie!
Who the fuck gave a nigger a goddamn gun!
Ain't no nigger gonna-
Aah! God! Ah my God, aah!
Motherfucker!
Hold your fire!
Stop shooting, goddammit!
Django!
What?
We got your woman!
Billy Crash here ha' got his pistol upside her head!
You don't stop all that cayyin' on,
he gon' blow her goddamn brains out.
And that ain't no threat, horse-boy!
That there is a promise.
Or, or…
You can give up…
Throw y' gun out, uh?
We won't kill Hildi.
Horseshit!
Honest injun Django, I swear 'fore God.
You give up?
Ain't no harm gonna come t'you.
And I'm supposed to believe your black ass?
Personal, I ain't give a good goddamn what you believe or don't believe!
I believe, if you don't give up in the next ten seconds,
we gonna blow this bitch's brains out!
Believe that!
You give me up.
Six!
Just let me go!
Seven!
– I- I care too much. – Django.
Eight!
I love you.
Nine!
- Hold it! - No!
I give up.
I can't hear you, nigger.
I said: I give up!
Cock a doodle doo, nigger.
So y'all bounty hunters, huh?
I knew there was something fishy 'bout y'all.
We found your “wanted” posters… and book of figures in your saddle bags.
I gotta say…
I ain't never heard of no black bounty hunter before.
A black boy paid to kill white men, how d'you like that line of work?
Prob'bly pretty good while it lasted, uh?
Time to say goodnight to them nuts, black.
On three…
One…
I got you.
Two…
Calm down nigger, here come-
Cap't?
Miss Lara wants to see you.
That is somethin' to do with the Old Man's funeral.
Oh, and she changed her mind 'bout snippin' Django.
She gonna give 'em to the LeQuint Dickey people.
Well she didn't waste a minute tellin' me.
How disappointing.
You'll leave.
These here is…
what you can take with you.
Your black ass been all the motherfuckers' in the Big House
can talk about for the last few hours.
Seemed like white folk ain't never had a bright idea in their life,
was comin' up with all kinds o'ways to kill your ass.
Now mind ya, most of 'dem ideas had to do with fuckin' with your fun parts.
Now, that may seem like a good idea, but truth is…
when you snip a nigger's nuts, most of 'em bleed out, in, oh 'bout…
seven minutes, most of 'em…
Well, more n' most.
Then I says…
Shitfire…
the niggers we sell to LeQuint Dickey, got it worse then that.
And they're still sayin' “Let's whip 'em to death”,
Throw 'em to the mandingos”, “Feed 'em to Stonesipher's dogs”.
And I say, “What's so special 'bout that? We do that shit all the time!
Hells bells, the niggers we sell to LeQuint Dickey got it worse then that”.
Low and behold, out of nowhere, miss Lara come up with the bright idea
of givin' your ass to the LeQuint Dickey Mining Company.
And as a slave of the LeQuint Dickey Mining Company,
hence forth, till the day you die,
all day, ev'ryday,
you will be swingin' a sledgehammer,
turning big rocks into little rocks.
Now when you get there, they gonna take away your name,
give you a number, and a sledgehammer,
and say “get to work”.
One word of sass, they cuts out your tongue,
they's good at it too, you won't bleed out.
Ooh, they does that realk good.
They gonna work you, all day, ev'ry day, till your back give out.
Then they gonna hit you in the head with a hammer,
throw your ass down the nigger hole.
And that… will be the story of you, Django.
Hey, white boy…
I said: hey, white boy!
Shut up, black, you ain't got nothing to say I wanna hear.
How'd you like to make eleven thousand dollars?
Do what now?
I said, how d'you like to make eleven thousand dollars?
Eleven thousand five hundred, actually.
What the fuck are you talking about?
Back there at that plantation Candyland,
there was an eleven thousand five hundred dollar fortune,
just sittin' there, and y'all rode right past it.
You be damned, blackie, we're not bandits.
I ain't sayin' that, nice thing 'bout this fortune it is.
It ain't illegal, you can't steal it,
ya gotta earn it, white boy.
You got something to say, mate, you say it.
The eleven thousand five hundred dollar fortune waiting for you back at Candyland,
is in the form of a wanted dead or alive bounty
on Smitty Bacall, and the Bacall Gang.
Who the fuck is Smitty Bacall?
Smitty Bacall is the leader of this murderous gang of stagecoach robbers,
the Bacall Gang.
There's a seven thousand dollar wanted dead or alive bounty on him,
one thousand five hundred dollars for each of his three accomplices.
Dandy Michaels,
Gerald Nash,
Crazy Craig Koons.
Now all four o'them gentlemen, they're back there at Candyland,
laughin' their ass off. You know why?
'Cause they just got away with murder.
But it ain't got to be that way.
You and your mates, ya'll can ride back there and y'all can go get that money.
What these jokers do again?
These sonofabitches, they- they killed innocent people.
Stagecoach robbery. Innocent white people!
I got the handbill right here in my pocket if you let me get it.
Get it out.
Wanted dead or alive… Smitty Bacall and the Smitty Bacall gang.
But you're a slave!
I ain't no goddamn slave!
Do I sound like a fuckin' slave?
7000 dollars for Smitty Bacall… That's a shit load!
I'm a bounty hunter.
Yesterday, as a free man, I rode into Candyland,
on a horse, with my German white partner, Dr. King Schultz.
We tracked the Bacall gang all the way from Texas, to Chikasaw County.
We finally found their ass laying low at Candyland.
We went in there to get 'em, things went sour,
my partner got killed, Calvin Candie got shot.
Then ev'rybody there decided to blame me, so here I am.
But y'all know I ain't on that manifest,
and all'ya know I ain't supposed to be on this trip.
But them four men are still back there, they're still wanted,
and that eleven thousand five hundred is up for grabs,
and the last thing they'd expect is y'all ridin' back there and gittin' it.
What's the deal?
You tell us who they are and we… turn you lose?
I ain't tellin' who they are.
Look, you give me a pistol, one o'them horses,
and five hundred dollars of that eleven thousand five hundred,
and I'll point 'em out to you.
This a real handbill.
Ah jus'cause it's a real handbill doesn't mean that other bunch o'malarky is.
Now why would a slave have a wanted dead or alive handbill in his pocket?
Ain't that black ride into Candyland yesterday?
Alright…
I'm gonna ask you again…
I want you to remember I don't like liars.
Is he a Candyland slave, or did he ride in with a white man on horse yesterday?
Yeah.
They walked us from the Greenville Auction and
he rode in on a horse with a white man.
And this white man…
was the black his slave?
He weren't no slave.
You you fuckin' sure about that?
Damn sure.
What happened over at Candyland?
Bunch of shootin'…
massa' got shot.
– Who shot 'em? – The German.
Why did he do that?
The nigger and the German was actin' like they were slavers, but they weren't.
Well, what was they?
Bounty hunters.
Fuck me Roy, I mean this- this could be big, mate!
Well, smoke…
you gotta deal.
I got one more condition.
What is that?
When we get there… when the time come…
you let me help you kill 'em.
Hey! You're a funny bugger!
- Get him loose. - Yeah, yeah.
You got yourself a deal, blackie.
You got yourself a deal, mate.
– Oi! Eh, you alright for a black fella?! – Oh yeah!
There ya go… There ya go, mate.
For you, we'll give you that pack horse over here.
What's them saddle bags got in?
Dynamite.
I ain't ridin' no horse with no goddamn dynamite on his back.
I can understand that.
Frankie, why don't ya take 'em sticks off that horse,
and stick 'em in the nigger cage.
A little dynamite for you black buggers to play with!
Hey Floyd, you got that rifle on the wagon, don't you?
Yeah, alright.
Why don't you give 'em your gun and gun belt?
Now, don't drop the fucking thing, alright?
I just had the sights fixed, and they're perfect.
Uh, that's good to know.
Throw me up that dynamite.
– Jake! – Yeah?
Get out there n' see what's goin'on with them goddamn dogs!
D'Artagnan, motherfucker!
Auf wiedersehen.
It's me, baby.
♪In the sweet…
♪bye n' bye…
♪we will leave…
♪on that beautiful song.
♪Bye n' bye… bye bye…
♪we will leave… we will leave bye n' bye.
Cora,
would you prepare us some coffee?
Sheba, you help her.
Come on.
♪In the sweet…
♪bye n' bye, ooh…
Ya'all gonna be together with Calvin and the bye n' bye.
Just a bit sooner than ya'all was expectin'.
Billy Crash!
Now where were we…?
Oh, that's right.
Last time I seen you, you had your hands on my…
D-Django!
You black sonofabitch!
The "D" is silent, Hill Billy!
Oh no!
Now, all o'you black folks, I suggest you get away from all these white folks.
Not you Steven.
You're right where you belong.
Uh, Cora, before you go…
would you tell miss Lara goodbye?
Do- do what now?
I said tell… miss Lara… goodbye.
Bye miss Lara.
Ya'all two run along now.
Steven!
How you like my… new duds?
You know, before now I didn't know that burgundy was my color.
I count six shots, nigga'.
I count two guns, nigga'.
You said in 76 years on this plantation, you seen all o'manner shit done to niggas'?
But I noticed…
you didn't mention knee cap'n.
Seventy six years, Steven…
how many niggers you think you see come n' go, uh, 7000…?
8000…?
9000…?
9999?
Ev'ry single word that came out of Calvin Candie's mouth was nothin' but horse shit.
But he was right 'bout one thing.
I am that one nigger in ten thousand.
You sonofabitch!
You motherfucker!
Oh sweet Jesus, let me kill this nigger!
You ain't gon' get away with this, Django.
They gon' catch your black ass…
You gonna be on the 'wanted' posters now nigger,
the bounty hunters gonna be looking for you.
You can run, nigger,
but they gonna find your ass!
And when they do, oh I love what they gonna do to your ass.
They gonna just kill you, nigger!
You done, fuck'd up!
This Candyland, nigger!
You can't destroy Candyland!
We been here long way, they's always gonna be a Candyland!
Can't no nigger gunfighter get all the way from don't know where to…
Django!
You uppity son a b-
Hey Little Trouble Maker.
Hey Big Trouble Maker.
You know what they are going to call you?
The Fastest Gun in the South.
Let's git outta here.
Caption and sync: jcdr v 1.1 - 08.01.2013
Thanks to Boon23 and Benjamin Fletcher for their corrections!